INTRODUCTION

Where to begin? It was a dark and stormy night...  (Snoopy).  No. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times...  ...

Tuesday, October 8, 2019

The Thin Blue Ride - Top 25 Random Thoughts

Tuesday, October 8th, 2019

I believe it may provide the reader valuable insight into my cognitive processes were I to publish a sampling of random thoughts for your perusal.  Scary, I know.  But - silent waters run deep, and these thoughts have never been voiced - yet.  So suck it up and give 'em a read - you just might learn something.  One never knows from whence wisdom may flow.  Enjoy...

1. When you live in a space where the living room and kitchen lights have side by side switches, and the lights are only six feet apart, it is necessary that you like the person sharing that space with you.

2.  I'm tired of my legs aching every night.

3.  You really can survive with only six forks and six spoons.

4.  Kentucky dogs suck.  And its corollary, I hate Kentucky dogs.

5.  Your house shouldn't wobble when your bride rolls over in bed at night.

6.  Oreos and Hostess Cupcakes are the biblical manna and will be had for every meal in Heaven.

7.  Angels don't get fat.

8.  75% of one’s time crossing the country is spent climbing, the other 25% of one’s time is fun.

9.  Everyone will be riding bicycles in either Heaven or Hell, but not both.  I'll leave to the theologians the argument over which.

10. Planning is important - if one rides the Trans/Am one should either be a natural planner or take one along - I chose the later.

11. Best overheard conversation of the trip, “Be sure to lock the door and feed the parrot.”

12. Appreciate random acts of kindness when they happen.

13. Ignore random acts of stupid when they happen.

14. Bumpass is a great name for a town.

15. The entire country is made of hills and their larger variant, mountains - except for Kansas.

16. As a general rule, don’t believe Verizon’s claim that they have nationwide cell coverage.

17. As a general rule, don’t believe Verizon.

18. Never again in my lifetime will I be able to eat as much and as often as I did this summer.

19. I’ve heard Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a prayer” so many times that I actually once hallucinated while climbing and thought I was Bon Jovi.

20. The day I touched Delta’s front tire against the Victory Column in Yorktown, it was all worth the struggle.

21. Staying in one place for more than a day is thoroughly enjoyable.

22. All RV Parks are located next to one of the following: train tracks, airports, or interstate highways.

23. When you encounter road kill opossum in a car, you have just enough time to determine that it may have been an opossum.  On a bike, you experience all the subtle nuances of the dead opossum.

24. It should be illegal to put a spoiler on the back of a Volkswagen Beetle - even a new one.

25. One accumulates wisdom in many ways.  If time spent lost in thought is among them, bicycles make one wiser.

26. Bonus random thought:  Wisdom and riding a bicycle across the country are mutually exclusive.

Monday, October 7, 2019

The Thin Blue Ride - Part 3 Day 28 - Glen Carbon, IL to Manhattan, KS

Sunday, October 6th, 2019

Drive Report:  382 Miles / 5:41. This would be the most miles covered in one day in The Rig during the trip.  We were ready to get home and delaying one day by halving the mileage would have made us both antsy.  So, we were up, fed and on the road by about 0915 and arrived in Manhattan at about 1700 that afternoon.  Yes, I know that this totals 7:45, but to remain consistent I’ve always provided the reader Google Maps version of drive time rather than our actual.  There are three reasons for this.  First, The Rig doesn’t travel at anything approximating what the typical driver would consider to be “regular” speed.  Don’t misunderstand - when Susan is driving, we beat the Google Maps averages.  I, on the other hand, am a more cautious sort and lag considerably behind her speed and more than off-set her panic inducing efforts.  Second, I likely won’t be able to keep track of the actual drive time - speed induced anxiety being deleterious to accurate time keeping and all.  And third, I'm the one writing the blog - lest anyone have forgotten.  So there.

My apologies (again) for this post being late.  When we made it back to MHK, our neighbors to the East (who have been helping, among others, keep an eye on things while we've been galavanting about the country) invited us over for smoked pork butt, cowboy beans, potato salad and coleslaw.  I had no idea pigs smoked, but - YES - we'll be right over.  This, of course, brought about the necessary amount of yakking and prevarication concerning our trip.  (I shall leave it to the reader's devices who was doing the yakking and who was doing the prevaricating.)  And this meant that we got home too late for me to finish the post.  So - here it is today.

And speaking of posts, following this one, there shall be one more post in The Thin Blue Ride series before the author takes a sabbatical.  So, tune in tomorrow for my top 25 nuggets of wisdom gleaned from the ride.  However, I also reserve the right to post addendum as I see fit.  For example - when we make the pilgrimage back to Albuquerque to pick up the Moto Guzzi.  It was, after all, part of the series, so I feel some obligation to report on it. Likewise, the reader should feel an obligation to read it.  Just sayin...

Now that we're done with the housekeeping chores, here's the day in pics...

T&G live a mere 25 miles from Missouri, so it didn't take us long to get here.  Yes, I know that the reader has already seen a "Welcome" sign for Missouri, but we're on the last leg of the journey today, so there's some extra weight given to these markers.


Shortly after entering Missouri we were passed by this dude.  I have never seen a bike with that much rise.  The guy literally couldn't see the road for the gas tank and headlight.  You could see him looking to either side to drive it.  An aside - try sitting on the edge of your couch and get into the position he's in while driving that thing.  Bet ya won't last long.  The girl on the back, however, looked very comfortable.  Why shouldn't she?  She had a living bug screen.  Can you imagine what that guy's forehead looks like after a ride.  Just as he peeks around the gas tank - SPLAT.  I bet he carries a hankie...  


After looping to the NW of St. Louis on I-270, we found this.  OK - now we're rolling.  


Then it was these two cool iron bridges.  While I love 'em, I think the era of iron bridges is past.


This would be the Mississippi.  The last time I saw this I was headed into Chester, IL.  Not coincidentally on an old iron bridge that had seen better days - 25 years ago.  The river looks a bit higher now than then.  The reader should note that it's comfortably muddy.  Those clear mountain streams where you could see the fish were wearing on me.  Gimme a river where you can't see your hand 4" below the surface any day...


These two barns (?) I guess were right off I-70.  I dunno who those Shyrocks are (open the pic and read sign on the right barn) but they have good taste in barns.


Then it was time to pull into a gas station called "Pyro City" to fill up the tank.  Now normally if I were to tell a tale like this, there are at least some among you who would doubt my veracity.  I proffer this pic as proof (yet again) of my forthrightness and transparency.  But really, "Pyro City"?  There's something incongruous about a gas station with a pyrotechnic nomenclature.  Susan walked out with a huge pile of Black Cat firecrackers holding a lit punk between her teeth.  Good Lord!  And then she gets all cranky when I hit her with a blast from The Rig's handy fire extinguisher.  She says they sell 'em by the pound?  This was Missouri, BTW.  Figures...


We hit the road and before we knew it, we were rolling into Kansas City.  Fortunately the Chiefs game today had the late start and traffic wasn't too bad, even tho we went right past the stadium.


This would be the Kansas River.  Only the cool states have rivers named after them.   I checked and there's no "Texas River".


Plus - Kansas has Dwight D Eisenhower, war hero, President, golfer extraordinaire, driving force behind the Interstate highway system, the list goes on.  This is way better than Indiana bragging up Benjamin Harrison on their state line sign.  What'd that guy ever do?  And could anybody even name him before they read the sign?


Shortly, we pulled in at the Lawrence rest stop to change drivers and get three chocolate chip cookies at McDonalds.  I'll give ya three guesses who got two and who got only one.  I saw this info board there.  Having previously mentioned the Flint Hills, I thought I'd point out to the reader that purple section running N and S in the Eastern third of the state.  That's the Flint Hills.  Given how wide it is at the top, and that Manhattan sits at the widest point, it is clearly the predominant geological feature where we're headed.


They had this at the rest stop also.  I've heard of these.  I've believe it's a chicken of some sort.  Given what I've read about the decline in prairie chicken numbers and that I've never seen one of these before, I concluded that it must be a prairie chicken.  They're also kinda fat and pathetic looking.  No wonder they're in decline...


Westward ho - on to Topeka.  This is the state capital dome.  It looks a bit dreary right now.  Not too long ago it was re-cladded in copper and it retained its coppery sheen for a time.  Now it's starting to age.  At some point it will regain that green patina we all know and love. 


We're nearing the finish line now.  About a three mile section of I-70 lies in Riley County - where in my previous life I worked for RCPD.  So this is clearly my old stomping grounds. 


But to get there ya hafta take the 313 exit to see this...


The Bill Snyder highway.  If ya hafta ask - well...don't.  Just Google it.  He was apparently a great slayer of prairie chickens and is almost single handedly responsible for their disappearance and near extinction in the fall of each year.


This is a great shot and a pretty sight all at the same time.  Highway K-177 just topping the last hill before descending into the Kansas River Valley where Manhattan is located.  It is also the site of the highest speeds ever reached on a bicycle by yours truly and the Mrs.  Twice on my single bike I hit 59 mph on this downhill.  Once with Susan on the tandem.  On both occasions we had a significant tailwind.   My all time high speed is on the tandem - by .1 mph.  On that occasion we coasted all the way to the viaduct over the Kansas River and the Manhattan City Limits - some 3 miles distant.  


Finally, we're home.  Well - almost...


OK - now it's official.  We walked in and Susan said the house smelled funny.  I told her it wasn't me.  (Susan read this and said, "REALLY!  That's our big ta-dah!!")

Author's note:  I'm just not a big ta-dah kinda guy, I guess.

Be sure to tune in tomorrow for the final episode of The Thin Blue Ride.  (Barring, of course, any future addendum.)

Till next time.

Saturday, October 5, 2019

The Thin Blue Ride - Part 3 Day 27 - Glen Carbon, IL

Saturday, October 5th, 2019

Drive Report: None - We goofed off with Tim & Glynda Gasser all day.

This is a quick pic of The Rig at T&G's place - it's final layover before reaching MHK on Sunday.  It was a slow morning, which fits Susan and I just right.  As an added bonus, Glynda made pancakes.  I like Glynda - just don't tell her.


In the afternoon T&G took us on a tour of local areas of interest.  This was our first stop.  Given my prior life at RCPD, they thought of this.  Perfect!  Unfortunately, they were closed.  Not perfect!


So it was on to the next donut place.  These are some really good friends - no?  I wanted the t-shirt from this one, so in we went.


The shirt below and to the right of the bank robber mask is the one I was after.  Unfortunately, the only size they had left was 2X.  Odd - one would think those would be the first to go at a donut shop.  Even more problematic, Susan was intrigued with the bank robber ski mask.  Given the proclivities she demonstrated at Plymouth (see Part 3 Day 13), I left.  I don't want to have to testify.  


When I saw that the town with these shops was named after a pastry, I wasn't surprised.  I'm pretty sure they call those leclaires.  It's French - who knows...


Then they took me to a place where I could pick out my own steak for grilling tonight.  WOW!  I need to come here more often.


And the same place sold THESE!  Unfortunately, after being treated so shabbily by the Hostess legal department, I've sworn off anything from Hostess.  Regardless of whether its heaven in a cellophane wrapper or not.


And they were on such a roll.  I didn't know T&G were closet vegetable consumers.  What a pity...


Us with Tim and Glynda.  Tim is the tall one.  Friends are friends, now matter the years, the distance or the frequency with which you see to see each other.  Even if they do eat vegetables.

We head home tomorrow.  It'll be a big day - the post for which may show up a day late given the time we expect to reach MHK.  We'll just have to see.

Till next time.


The Thin Blue Ride - Part 3 Day 26 - Greenfield, IN to Glen Carbon, IL

Friday, October 4th, 2019

Drive Report:  246 Miles / 3:45

There were several official "final times" to The Thin Blue Ride as of last night: final time sleeping in The Rig, final shower in a box just big enough to stand in, final stay in an RV park, etc.  All this because by close of business today we'll be in Glen Carbon, IL visiting friends from BK (Before Kids) and staying at their house for two nights before heading out on our final trek in The Rig - the trek to MHK.

Today started a little slow, but turned out to be an adventure from which I am still recovering.  But the reader hadn't ought to feel bad for me, I knew what I was getting when I signed up...


OK - admittedly, this pic would be a lot better if there wasn't a high voltage power line in the background, but it's pretty good all the same.  This is a small Methodist Church we passed shortly after leaving the RV Park this morning.  The medium blue sky as a backdrop is pretty slick.


We decided to take the long road to Glen Carbon, IL (a St. Louis suburb) today so we went via Brazil.  In the recent past we've been to all sorts of exciting places; Paris, Russia, Macedonia, etc - but I didn't want to be seen as bragging.


We also passed back into Illinois again today.  We haven't seen Illinois since crossing the Mississippi River while headed East during the ride portion of the trip.  I thought I'd include this shot so the reader could appreciate the...simplicity...of Illinois' sign compared to, say, Indiana's from yesterday.  Additionally, the only other Illinois sign the reader saw was the one just outside Chester, IL when I was riding.  You may recall that it was plastered with stickers from passing T/Aers.  Ya can actually see this one.

Buckle up - this is where things went south.

I took this one as Susan was driving down the Interstate.  (Note:  Professional Driver on an open course, do not attempt this at home.)  She wanted something from the back.  I can't recall what it was - wait, it was lip balm - so I went to get it.  As I made my way back to the front, I heard her mumbling under her breath, something about "...shoot the gap."  I'd no idea what she was talking about until I got back up front and saw...


...this.  Aaaaaaaggggghhhhhhhh!  As we went thru, Susan pulled out the lip balm I had just given her, rolled down her window, and tagged the FedEx guy's lead trailer with the Teamster's Logo.  Apparently there is still some animosity between Teamsters and the Fed Ex guys stemming from FedEx drivers in Charlotte voting to de-certify the Union in 2017.  I'm caught up in an internecine war...


Shortly after Susan's road rage incident there was this.  I didn't say anything - just hoped that she'd note that it was 100 feet tall and reflect on her recent behaviour.


As we got closer to Glen Carbon, scenes like this became more common.  The reader should note how far they can see in this pic.  We certainly did.  There's something about being in the East with your sight obstructed for so long by all those trees.  It leaves one feeling almost claustrophobic.  We both prefer our spaces a little more wide open.

We're close to home now.  Our intent at this point is to be back in Manhattan by Sunday evening.

Till next time.



Thursday, October 3, 2019

The Thin Blue Ride - Part 3 Day 25 - Butler, OH to Greenfield, IN

Thursday, October 3rd, 2019

Drive Report: 225 Miles / 3:39 (But this is a lie.) This because it took a LOT longer than 3:39 to get to Greenfield.  In the main, because at 0350 this morning (while we were still snug and comfy in bed) some unknown woman in Columbus, OH had the great misfortune to wander thru both ditches of the NB lanes of I-270 and then strike two electrical poles 78 feet from the highway.  The decedent’s car broke both utility poles and caused the power lines to sag over I-270.  This occasioned the closure of the road to repair said damage.  (According to local news outlets.)  And this, in turn, is what sent us and everyone else on both NB and SB I-71 scrambling for a route thru town to avoid the closed Interstate - hence the oodles of extra time on the road today.  As I type this it is 1645.  So - we lost somewhere between 1.5 to 2 hours getting thru Columbus.  While unfortunate, not nearly so much so as the decedent.

But, both before and after this unfortunate happenstance, we encountered plenty to talk about as well as some pics.  But first - some more talking.  Have I discussed highways lately?  No.  Because the states we’ve been in recently - namely Connecticut, Massachusetts and New Hampshire actually maintained theirs.  Such has not proven to be the case in Ohio (moderately well maintained in places - terrible in others) and Indiana (where we have only just arrived.)  Sections of I-70 in Indiana remind me of a Walmart parking lot that was in need of maintenance when given over to some place like Hobby Lobby for further neglect after Walmart moved out.  It was horrible.  Change was popping up out of the change holder in the dash, the AC cover fell from the ceiling, things plugged in fell from their receptacle, and there was the repeated Metallic BANG that only people who drive RV’s know.  But at least Indiana was kind enough to raise the speed limit to 70 mph on this long, straight stretch of neglected parking lot.  The tractor trailers appreciated it as they formed up in a line astern to pass us.  It was like the battle of Surigao Straight all over again - and we were on the receiving end.  Google it - the last time the ”T” was crossed in a naval engagement. (Well - OK - it wasn’t really that bad.  But it wasn’t fun either.)

OK - now that I’ve vented my spleen about the road conditions today, there were some highlights.  Some interesting scenery, a new state logged in the RV, probably the coolest barn of the entire trip...that sorta stuff.  Here’s what it looked like...

Right before we left the RV park this morning there had been a dense fog advisory, it had clearly lifted by the time we got out.  But the morning was beautiful and the pavement was (blessedly) good.  A rarity here, but as the reader can tell, this stretch was just repaved.  We had about 30 miles to get back to SB I-71.  Trust me when I say that it didn't look like this the whole way. 


Well, the scenery did, just not the road.  There were some quite sharp hills first thing this morning.  When I'm goin' over a hill top and slow down at the crest because the road still isn't visible in front of me, it's steep.  This was one of those.


Like I said, the scenery was pretty nice.


There were also some curves.  It reminded me of when, in Kansas, engineers build roads that generally follow a creek.  But they don't put 'em right beside the creek.  Instead, they put 'em on the sides of the hills close to the creek and then bend the road around as the hills bend with the creek.  Except here, there wasn't a creek, they were just following the contours of the hills in order to limit, as best as possible, going up and down all the time.  This is the result.


OK - best dang barn of the trip.  While it needed paint (a strike against it), it was HUGE, still solid, it had not one but two cupolas on top, then there's that overhang at the bottom - way cool.  Even money says that on the side away from the road there was a ramp leading to an upper floor hay loft to save work.  I'd have loved to get inside for a look see.


With this shot from the side, I'm betting that the overhang permits wagons to drive under and then hay can be thrown down from the loft onto the wagons below.


This barn isn't nearly as impressive, but it was immaculately maintained, as were the rest of the buildings.  We heard from the RV Park proprietor last night that there are a number of Amish in the area.  Hmmm - wonder if that has anything to do with the barns and their condition?


HEY - look at that!  We haven't driven on I-70 since turning off it onto K-156 West of Salina, KS on the first day of our trip.  It's true Toto - we're on our way home.

Disclaimer:  All pictures thus far in the post were taken by and used with permission of Susan Schoen Photography, LLC.  (I was driving.)


When Susan took over, I snagged this one.  Neither of us had any idea what this building was, but it made clear that we were still in Ohio.


As for myself, I had no doubt, since the good folks of Ohio had not yet bid us adieu.  (I picked up some French hanging out at Lake Champlain - only 27 miles from Quebec.)  I thought this (see pic) odd though.  Upon entering the state we were visited with the typical "Welcome to..." sign.  But when we leave?  Katie bar the door, we're gonna bend a tapered I-beam and stretch it over the highway - the better from which to hang our sign.


And as expected, we were soon in Indiana.  The crossroads of America - not sure how that works when the geographic center of the CONUS is in Kansas.  But anyway, they also harbored Lincoln during his formative years and lay claim to Benjamin Harrison.  And all this on one colorful sign.  Well then.  I suppose one had not ought to ask, "What have you done for me lately?"


We were pulling into the RV Park for the night when what to my wondering eyes do appear, but a huge field of beans to horizon and near.  Seriously, the farther South we went in Indiana, the more of this there was to see - and the more familiar it all became.  (To the tune of???)  It's beginning to look a lot like Kansas, every where I go, take a look at the beans again, note the clouds they are very thin, straight rows for when combines come agaaaaiiin...

C'mon - c'mon now - that's the definition of hilarious.  Besides, Walmart has Christmas stuff out already.  I'm just trying my best to stay relevant.

Till next time.

Wednesday, October 2, 2019

TheThin Blue Ride - Part 3 Day 24 - Ashtabula, OH to Butler, OH

Wednesday, October 2nd, 2019

Drive Report: 147 Miles / 2:20

As I said yesterday - short day today.  We pulled in to the KOA campground at about 1230, which is early for us.  But hey - laundry day is a big deal.  A guy doesn't wanna be without socks or...other stuff.  And so far as KOAs go, this one is...well...rustic.  Frankly I'm surprised that KOA sanctioned this particular RV Park.  And for a number of reasons.

First, it's literally in the boonies.  We drove mostly county roads for 16 miles to get here.  Part of that is because it's slightly off route.  The other part is that there were no other KOAs near by.  This should have told us something.  I asked the proprietor what the draw to the area was.  He said that people come here because it's Amish Country and to "recreate" (my word, not his) on the nearby Mohican River.  It's so wooded and remote here we kept expecting to run into the last of the Mohicans.  Second, the park isn't kept up very well and appears lacking in organization.  But at least the owner cleaned the laundry room before Susan could.  That's something, I guess.

So - say your prayers and hope that Google Maps is as efficient at getting us out of the boonies tomorrow morning as it was getting us here this afternoon.  All that aside, the trip here was both short and interesting...

This guy passed us early this morning.  I haven't seen one of these since Kansas, I don't think.  We were gonna follow him all the way home, but after just a couple of miles we remembered why no one does that - follows a cattle truck.  We cut him loose.


Once we headed South away from Lake Erie the terrain turned hilly.  I was surprised and expected Ohio to have gently rolling hills with fewer trees.


This was taken on a stretch of I-271.  For some reason the opposing lanes were elevated on a rather tall bridge while our side was much lower.  I couldn't figure out why.  But bridges aren't cheap, so I suspect there must have been a reason.


Susan took a pic of the Interstate early in the day while I was driving, but I forgot to include it - and as slow as cell service here is, I ain't going back to try an upload another pic.  Just believe me when I say that it showed three lanes with no traffic ahead of us for at least 3/4 of a mile.  Yeah - this is not that pic.  I took this one right after Susan started driving.  Readers who open this pic will be able to count seven rigs ahead of us.  At one point, Susan had one behind, one beside and one in front of us.  We were surrounded by Teamsters - she felt right at home.  She's been after me lately to install a CB radio in The Rig.  Teamsters are so 70s.


When this guy passed us, Susan told me she'd seen his rig before.  Turns out he was in last month's issue of Teamster's Travels magazine as winner of the "Rig of The Month".  (Apparently there is a calendar with pics of all 12 with their hoods up.)  There was enough chrome on this rig to plate an aircraft carrier.  And check out that paint job.  While the reader can barely see it, the tractor had an identical paint scheme.


But soon thereafter, we were in the aforementioned boondocks.  Not that the views were bad - just the roads... 


Another cool shot of an old farmstead.  Those are beans in the foreground.


And here are the previously mentioned roads.  I was a bit edgy, but Susan was quite calm having spent something like, oh, 4,000 miles on similar roads recently.


A combine!  We haven't seen one of these since about Kansas either.


The countryside was littered with nifty shots like this, but I had to pick just a few.


I like this one with the road disappearing in the distance.


And this one, where it disappears much closer to the dashboard.  Remember, I'm riding with Miss, "That's no 35 mile per hour curve, I took it at 45."  I've never seen an RV drift a curve before...


But she straightened it out just in time for me to snag this shot out my window.  I fully expected it to be blurry what with the speed we were traveling, but iPhone cameras must be pretty good.


When we got to this spot we both thought it reminded us of Missouri what with the trees and the road bobbing up and down over the hills.

Since today we departed the vicinity of the Great Lakes generally, let me say two words: Edmund Fitzgerald.  A couple of days ago when we approached Lake Erie, Gordon Lightfoot's song about the EF got stuck in my mind.  This morning at breakfast I searched YouTube and found this...


It's a hauntingly majestic song about the sinking of the Edmund Fitzgerald from 1976.  Twenty nine men lost their lives on that day in November of 1975 when she went down.  I was 16 when the song came out and only learned of the history of the EF much later in life.  So, take six minutes out of your day and give it a listen.  Then put yourself at the Maritime Sailors' Cathedral when that bell rang 29 times.  See if it doesn't tug at you.  It rings 29 times each year on the 10th of November...

Till next time.